Sunday, April 09, 2006

The school year that was...

Everything was a shock – the make-up, not to mention the red lipstick, the numerous essays, the Dale Carnegie sessions, etc. Eleven months ago, I was wondering if I can make it at OBMCI. There were days when I was already on the verge of quitting, but God helped me pull through. I was able to survive the rigorous Part I training, but I know it was just the start.

True enough, it was. It was just a sneak preview of what we would in fact experience inside the school with the students, with our colleagues and even with our superiors. However, I came to realize that what we have undergone during the summer training truly prepared us for this school year. It may not be enough, for we still have two more trainings to complete, but the first part of the training was indeed of great help. Albeit the difficulties I had and the great adjustments I had to deal with, I was glad of all the transformations in me. Those were all for the better.

I was made to obey. It’s not that I was disobedient before, but I was not just used to the things that we are being asked of, most importantly the make-up. Honestly, it was all against my will in the beginning of our training and there was something inside me that refused to follow. I was part of the corporate world for three long years where I have worked as a sales staff but I was never compelled to wear any make-up. There are lots of other requirements also, which at first I thought I would not be able to accomplish, but to my surprise, I did. I don’t find myself now whining and complaining too much as what I usually do before. I may have faltered a couple of times, but as what Montessori said, error is a friend. I took all those as learning experiences and try to do better each day.

“Patience is a virtue…” a phrase I would always say without really understanding its deeper meaning and without consistently living up to its real meaning...until I started teaching. Being an educator requires a great amount of patience for it is what will aid you in dealing with the children. I learned that no amount of shouting or anger would normalize the children. I used to complain how rowdy my students were and I was a couple of times on the brink of giving up in terms of disciplining them. Then I realized, I just have to extend my patience more for it is of good worth. With this patience, I found out that the pleasures of teaching little kids, their company, their interaction, their spontaneity, their innocence, is like fresh air in the suffocating environment that one finds oneself in, these days. Beyond doubt, my patience greatly improved and I feel more equipped now for the next school year.

You can never put a good man down. I believe in this for I myself proved this to be true with what I have experienced during the last few weeks before the school year ends. I became a subject of fabricated lies and I don’t even know where it all came from. Whoever could have done that to me, intentionally or unintentionally, I guess he or she just wants to put me down. Yes, I was inoperative for a couple of days until I realized that I should not allow myself to be defeated just that. I am just a human being and so, I was of course affected. But I soon realized I have nothing to be ashamed of, because my conscience is clear, I am doing nothing wrong and I am hurting no one. Therefore, I should not suffer at all. It’s not that I’m singing my own praises, but I am just proud of myself for I have discovered that I am strong enough to face problems I never imagined I would ever encounter in my entire life.

Indeed, everyday here in school is a new challenge. The work may be tiring and exhausting, but I have developed love for my work already. Perhaps I am really destined for teaching. The lessons learned I mentioned above are only among all the other countless lessons I would forever keep in mind, for these did not only make me a better teacher, but a better person as a whole.